Thursday, May 3, 2012

5/3 - What's Really Appalling...

L4 - that LW4 had such low self-esteem that he had to marry somebody who had no chance whatsoever of meeting and besotting her particular celebrity of choice. Also, given the nature of the selections made by various celebrities in the romantic department, one might well wonder how far down the chain W4 must have sunk for the cause truly to be hopeless.

As for the actual situation, there seem to be two possible courses in play. LW4 himselfseems on the brink of stumbling upon the passive-aggressive response of shutting down and claiming to W4 that he's just no use because he can't measure up to CC4 in any way, shape or form. That might be a useful line to follow if one seeks to divorce. The Prudecutor advises a rival obsession, which would have about the same effect as might be observed if one were to direct a stream of liquid from the siphon onto some burning chops.

The Strindberg solution would be to feed W4's obsession rather than fight it. Send her off to pursue her dream of meeting and mating with CC4, and let her crawl back to base sadder but wiser. A variation on this would be to outdo W4 on the obsession front. This would require credible bisexuality, but would seem to have the highest chance of success in manipulating W4 into wanting never to hear CC4's name or see his image again.

L1 - that N1 has reached the lofty age of nineteen without having the slightest clue how to cope with a bullying former friend on a social networking site. People who make pornography ought to be able to cope with Facebook. It is moderately less appalling that the Prudecutor, who in the past has been the first to defend mothers who were major porn stars, should treat N1's chosen course as if it were universally terrible and not just something that worked out poorly for N1 herself.

Of course the Prudecutor rambles on through legal channels in her wish to castrate the pornographer. LW1 might also follow a slightly different course. It might well be possible to instill in N1 that she can face the world without any particular sense of shame over what she did. The Prudecutor would have N1 cover her tracks and then go on to be stridently anti-pornography in the future, which to these tired old eyes looks remarkably similar to the path followed by various evangelists.

L2 - ...comes from the Prudecutor. Just as likely? Just as likely?!? Quite possible - fine. Not uncommon - sure. But "just as likely" is typical prosecutorial and Prudecutorial overreach. I'll tell the Prudector what's just as likely. What's just as likely as the picture painted by the Prudecutor is that GF2 will decide LW2 is all she'll ever want in the way of a lover until after a few years of marriage when the glamour has worn off and she decides to blame him for having pressured her into the institution without sufficient comparative experience. There is minor outrage over a woman nearly thirty being called a girl, as LW2 does. Such outrage is occasionally, as here, diminished when a male LW clearly does not want to control the female in question.

The letter is interesting, as it does seem as if this creates another of those situations in which women just can't win. Shamed for experience, shamed for inexperience. But somehow this does not seem as bad as the case of the non-vrigin whose fiance had preserved his own virginity and wanted a bride of the same status. Yes, G2 would be lucky not to have to stumble through with another neophyte, but there are tangible negative aspects to being someone's first in various regards, especially at a time of life when one might reasonably expect that would not be the case. There are many more trivial reasons for not dating someone.

It's a bit like Richard Powell's novel Tickets to the Devil, set during one of the three National bridge tournaments held each year by the ACBL. Among the various amourous pursuits during the tournament is the seduction of Vicky Summers by Jake Jacobs, which progresses as far as the revelation that she (past the age of thirty) is still a virign. Not quite the same pitfalls as face LW2, but enough to send Jake scampering off in the opposite direction.

It's a simple enough situation. Why the Prudecutor thinks that the experience of Julia Child will cut more ice with LW2 than the lives of his personal friends I've no idea. But this is like many qualities subjectively deemed less than desirable. Weigh the pros and cons and then decide.

L3 - that F3 has probably suffered far more than LW3 for the latter's omission and also that it's highly likely that LW3 will come out of reparations better than she deserves. It calls forth reminiscences of the Twineham murder case, which revolved around an ill-matched married couple. The Book of Revelations met the Age of Aquarius, ending in death and interrment beneath the sitting-room floor. But, during the case, Dodo McIntosh and She Who Must Be Obeyed were nearly scared off attending their old school reunion when that year's chair turned out to be the former Chrissie Snelling, whom they had ragged mercilessly at school, and whose sudden departure had caused them both to carry a heavy burden of guilt for years. They only discovered, after being pressed into attending, that Chrissie had always found them great fun, though their conduct might in modern times have been deemed bullying.

At least there was one question that it would have been virtually impossible to get wrong.

Moral: "When he showed signs of walking out on her, she might throw fits, have hysterics, shoot herself, shoot him, yell for lawyers, who knows?"

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